a reflection

to 12 (and 15 and 18) year old me:
please break down the notion of an ‘ideal’ relationship
and the idea that there necessary elements to a relationship.
unsubscribe from the notion that
anniversaries are celebrated with candles and champagne and
the perfect couple is always formed from best friends and
falling out of love is the only big problem you will face.
because real life is never that simple
and there is so much more to two peoples’ intertwined lives
than what the world sees them do
and what they let the world see them do.

please remember that everyone is different,
from their love language
(yours is affection)
to their chemistry with others;
that it’s never too late to start or end something;
that there will be ups and downs
that aren’t the end of the (your) world;
that what you have doesn’t have to be perfect,
just something you’re happy to wake up to.

and most of all,
please love what and who you have, had, and will have,
with all your heart,
and never regret anything.

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unspoken

there are the little gaps
here, there, words
left unspoken and
open to our own interpretation.
we fill it in with whatever
pleases our minds in that moment,
and maybe with something else some other time.
the truth bends a little to however we want it.
(right now, i’d like to think it’s a sign
of us knowing each other all too well)
harsh, blunt, real and solid sentences juxtaposed,
i think i like it better
like this

and I still love you, too; pt. 2

pt. 1

back again under  
tangled telephone lines 
sweet dusks and wide skies  
 
but in the quiet moments between  
loud laughter and 
the last burst of daylight’s colours 
just before nightfall – 
I wish you were here 

17, now. – you make me feel so

in the midst of it all
the loose leaf pages, flutter-by deadlines,
chatter of bilingual tongues,
and a sinking feeling so noiseless yet so persistent and
overwhelming loud –
i focus on you –
waves of clamour and chaos crash
to a slow, steady heartbeat, then:
silence.

a soft smile.